This Life Is Only A Test

"This life is only a test!...If this was an actual emergency, you. would…” have been given a complete and customized instruction manual.

No matter the direction life may take, make no mistake, one’s childhood mentally follows him or her throughout life, causing doubt in every move because one knows how naive they have been raised and things are just not the same in our adult world that we must now live in.

When children are subjected to harshness I believe it is some thing they can not comprehend, for they are with out guile free of deceit, cunning, hypocrisy, and dishonesty in thought or action. The lying and cruelness of how people treat each other is enough to make a child want to run for shelter and protection. Just think for a moment, if you were raised with no conflicts in child’s play. Could you have developed the skills needed to handle adult conflict? Do you roll up into a ball and become a victim in this harsh society? Do you just run away from it all or live in fear and cry? Life creates fear and fear is a powerful thing, especially for children. An individual gets confused through life's journey as to what is right and wrong, the world is not what we are raised to believe.

My transformation from childhood eyes to grown woman is still evolving. I am still digesting my thoughts on religion, forming thoughts on a conforming education system, realizing government can be dictating, grasping for the concept not to raise my children in what I deem to be correct and developing a marriage that allows for both identity and unity.

Life's choices mold us into the human we become. I move forward in teaching our children to believe in who they are and to trust in their choices. Not to let others mark their destiny, place labels, or to ever feel regret for who they are. There is a probable chance Alexis, Chandler and Olivia my feel disarrayed as they mature into adulthood and out grow their childhood perception.

It's easy to be a life line to others in the game of life, unearthing just the right answers, so quick to find consoling words, charmed to bestow comfort or praise and so it becomes that much harder to focus and ace our own life test.